“Unoffendable”

The holidays can be a whirlwind even when we try to stay in the moment. I had a hectic day yesterday, and the final rush toward Christmas seemed to fray everyone’s nerves. I watched people push, yell, and cut others off in traffic; I even watched someone berate an older woman because she was moving too slowly. And the list goes on.

I looked forward to my last appointment that day – taking advantage of the gift card someone had given me for a pedicure to help with my toe issue. I had saved it for the end of the day, ready to soak my feet and those sore toes. It would be a sweet relief! I had just sat down when I heard a woman’s voice.
“Ma’am, you need to move. That is my favorite chair, and I call it!”
Her words startled me, but I moved to the chair beside her.
Lord, could a nice person sit on the other side of me? I was here to enjoy this treat, not spend an hour beside someone acting hateful. But His answer was clear. Just wait, Lisa.

I was disappointed. Sharp words and short tempers were everywhere, and I was weary of being offended. But it wasn’t about me; maybe my job was to wait and soak my feet.
After a few minutes, the woman looked at me and said gruffly, “So, what’s your deal?”
You can’t make this stuff up! I chuckled a little inside, determined to stay positive about this encounter.
“Well, I’m using a gift card from a dear friend for this pedicure. So here I am! And you get to be my pedicure buddy.” I tried to be friendly, but she wasn’t having it, and she rolled her eyes at me. I was determined not to take offense.

Offense.

Maybe that’s why I was here. She complained that the water was too cold and had a few demands for how the pedicurist should treat her feet. I noticed her staring at my arm and realized she was looking at my bracelet. I adjusted the bracelet on my wrist, and there it was – the word “unoffendable” etched into it. My dear friend Peggy Boldizsar Nunley had given me the bracelet for days when I faced harsh words, offense, and hurt from others.

“What does that mean?” the woman asked.
This was an excellent time to explain everything about my bracelet. “The word reminds me that I can choose to be offended or let it go. It is always a choice. Being offended is tiring business, but letting things go is freeing and energizing. It also gives God room to work!

“I have needed this bracelet on many days when I couldn’t understand people’s desire to hurt others. It was also a reminder that many people are hurting and have endured offense from others. That changed the narrative of how I viewed my offenses.”

I looked up from my bracelet and saw that the woman’s eyes were filled with tears.
“You’ve been hurt, haven’t you?”
She could barely utter the word Yes before the tears began to fall. I grabbed her hand and sat quietly with her. We didn’t speak, and she continued to cry. I prayed quietly, and after about five minutes, I told her I knew what it felt like to be offended, but God understands our offenses better than we do.

Her eyes sparkled a little, and her lips began to turn upward into a smile, the first one I had seen from her.
“Do you have another bracelet like that?” she asked.
I took the bracelet off and put it on her wrist.
“It’s yours. I can get another one.”
She held her wrist against her heart and said, “You have no idea how much I need this right now. This holiday has been filled with more hurt and rejection than I can describe. I hate holidays, and I hate people.”

As we ended our chat, I told her that this could be the year she could release her anger and offense. Maybe it would be the most memorable holiday – for the better. I answered more of her questions, and after our pedicures, we walked to the parking lot together. I gave her copies of my books, a special Mabel Joy pup, and a purple quilt I happened to have in my trunk. Turns out purple is her favorite color. She hugged me before leaving, and I looked at her wrist where the “unoffendable “bracelet dangled.
“Maybe this will be a good Christmas after all,” she said.
I couldn’t agree more!