It was one of those afternoons when the world felt far away. Time didn’t matter, because my friend and I were sharing stories, crying, hugging, and then laughing so hard we had to come up for air. We were cherishing our friendship under the warmth of an afternoon sun and the background noise of our dogs playing. We could have stayed there for days and still not told all our stories. It was perfect. I spent the drive home thanking God for the precious friends in my life, and realizing that those deep, inner circle relationships are rare. Those kinds of friends accept all your imperfections and don’t vote you off the island when things get messy. They cry during the loss, celebrate after the victories, and hang with you through every ugly season. These friendships include not just talking, but listening; not just receiving, but giving. They bring joy to life and are love lived out loud. That means that the bonds are often forged through pain, and through sharing moments that knock us to the ground.
I recently had coffee with a dear friend who was grieving the loss of a friendship. She was asking why and how as she sorted through the hurt of what had happened. This 
friendship was so dear to her that losing it made her feel like a part of her identity was ripped away. A friendship that had once been beautiful was now broken. It seems these conversations keep coming around. For many, the pandemic has brought difficult friendship issues to the surface. What happens when a friendship ends? How do you navigate through that loss of trust and identity? These conversations help me reflect on the past year and cause me to realize that there are friendships that only last a season. As much as it hurts, I’m comforted in knowing that my identity in Christ doesn’t change. My worth is not determined by having an abundance of friends, but by the abundance of Christ’s love for me. The same is true for you. I read about a pastor who told his congregation, “Christ is the light at the end of your dark tunnel. And He’s not going anywhere. Others may leave, but He will stay.” He will stay. Through every chapter of your story, He is there, never leaving or forsaking you.
The broken friendships in my life-even the betrayals-have provided important lessons for me to hang onto. I now know that my heart may break, but my vision becomes clearer, and the truths that are revealed can set me free. I am grateful for those friends who came into my life for a season and those who remain for the long haul. Both are necessary. What I learned in the broken places helped me discern what is healthy in a relationship and what is not. Those lessons also allowed me to see how precious those deep, inner circle friendships are. I pay closer attention to how I can nurture and develop the relationships that last more than a season.
It takes time and vulnerability to heal broken trust, but the journey through those dark places is so worth it. If you are grieving the loss of a friendship today, I want to encourage you. Through the hurt and betrayal, God is there, and he hears you cry out from the broken place. He is the Friend who never leaves. As He wraps His arms around you, He will point you toward the friendships with the laughter, tears, hugs and stories. The friendships that stand the test of time help restore broken trust and give us a beautiful place to land when we feel like giving up.
John 15:15
I do not call you servants any longer, because servants do not know what their master is doing. Instead, I call you friends, because I have told you everything I heard from My Father.
Proverbs 18:24
Some friendships do not last, but some friends are more loyal than brothers.
Hebrews 13:5b
For God has said, ‘I will never leave you; I will never abandon you.’
Malachi 3:6a
I am the Lord, and I do not change.